Modest Proposal For A Raelian Clone Story Idea

People are worried about the Raelians because the Raelians claim they have cloned a human.

Former French journalist Claude Vorilhon, who now calls himself Rael, claims to be a direct descendant of extraterrestrials who created human life on Earth through genetic engineering. A company founded by his followers announced Friday that the first human clone has been born -- a 7-pound baby girl dubbed "Eve."

Should we accept this claim at face value? Some people doubt that the Raelians have made a clone baby. That great worry has distracted most people from the real danger: How do we know that the clone baby is human? Could it be that the Raelians have cloned an alien instead? They claim to have contact with aliens after all. Is it possible that Rael's alien allies have sent him a small pod that contains a bunch of cryogenically frozen fertilized alien embryos suitable for planting in a female human womb? Is the human cloning story designed to cover up a nefarious alien cloning plot?

First, let us examine the technological feasibility of alien cloning. The aliens would need a way to deliver the embryos from their home planet. Would aliens who first visited our planet well before recorded human history be able to cryogenically freeze embryos? Of course! Any species that can travel between the stars would be so technologically advanced that it certainly would have mastered cryogenics centuries ago. The technological feasibility of alien clone embryos genetically enhanced to be compatible with human wombs can scarcely be questioned.

The aliens might not even have sent the fertilized eggs recently. They could have hidden the eggs on the ocean floor in a spacecraft many centuries ago. Then once human medical technology had advanced far enough to be helpful in doing implantation they could have sent a message to Rael about how to find the eggs and how to do the implantations.

Next, do the aliens have evil intentions? Again, let us examine the evidence. Are there signs that the aliens are engaged in a galactic struggle? Does it sound like they have an enemy and a desire to use humans as a tool against that enemy? The evidence is in front of us. The Raelians are clearly enemies of the Ferengi.

"SCIENCE is the most important thing of all for humanity. You will keep yourself in touch with the advances made by scientists, because they can solve all your problems. Do not let scientific discoveries fall into the hands of those who only think of making profit, nor into the hands of the military, who keep certain inventions secret in order to retain a hypothetical supremacy over illusary enemies"
A quote from Yahweh Elohim in the book "Message given by Extra Terrestrials"

Now, this should really make us worried. They are advocating against capitalism. Why? What is wong with profit!? Could this be part of an alien plot to slow our rate of technological advance in order to make us an easy target for take-over by an alien clone army? The opposition to the use of science and technology for military purposes is obviously an additional reason to suspect the worst of those aliens. The aliens want us poor, technologically backward and defenseless. I call on you humanity, see through the alien tricks and deceptions! The time is approaching when you must be ready to fight for your planet against the alien clones.

There is an additional reason to be worried about the Raelians. Rael (see here and here) has a surprising resemblance to the insane religious fanatic Vulcan Sybok of the movie Star Trek V - The Final Frontier. Is this just a coincidence? Or could Rael be plotting to move humanity en masse beyond the galactic barrier to where some mad God has been imprisoned on a planet? Could the movie Star Trek V - The Final Frontier have been made as a warning against this plot? Could all of Star Trek have been secretly financed by the Raelian's biggest enemy in the galaxy, the real living non-fictional Ferengi? Could this have been done in order to lead up to the creation of the big counter-propagandistic warning movie Star Trek V - The Final Frontier? Think about how much sense that makes. The Ferengi are probably making big profits by secretly selling the rights to use their race as characters in movies and TV shows on primitive planets that have precious jewels. The Ferengi of course would not fight a war in a way that is unprofitable. By taking this approach the Ferengi are are making subtle propaganda to fight their enemy and yet doing so in a way that is profitable. That surely sounds like the sort of thing the Ferengi would do.

Use common sense. After you saw Star Trek V - The Final Frontier did you become more or less inclined to board an alien spaceship in order to ride off to meet some God or Prophet on some distant planet? Think about the Star Trek series in general. After you saw the Federation beat some Romulan space fleet did you become more or less willing to support a strong military and Star Wars anti-missile defenses? Star Trek is an obvious attempt to unite Earth into a space-faring warrior species to meet the alien threat.

How could the Raelians attempt to drive humanity off the planet Earth toward some mad God trapped on the edge of the galaxy? I can see an obvious way to do it: Foment a massive religious war of all religions against each other. The war would make the planet so uninhabitable that humans would eagerly board spacecraft that showed up to evacuate them. It just so happens that the Raelians claim that their alien friends have all the great creators of Earth religions still alive on their alien home world.

Now thanks to our scientific understanding, we have a chance to comprehend our origins and the true nature of these "Gods", who created us and who love us as their children. In 1973, French journalist "RAËL" was contacted by the Elohim, who asked him to make their final message known worldwide and to prepare an EMBASSY where they can officially land among us, bringing with them all the Prophets as announced by every religion. This information can be found in the book entitled: "The True Face Of God" written by Rael.

Coincidence? I don't think so. The aliens have been around for a long time and could easily have collected DNA samples from all the great historical religious leaders surreptitiously. Then they could clone the religious leaders and raise them to say whatever the aliens one them to say to start a world religious war. The motive of the aliens is made obvious by their choice of landing spot. If I was going to welcome truly friendly aliens to our planet for a visit I'd have them set down in a peaceful uncontroversial place like Kansas or perhaps in the Australian outback. Why would the aliens set down somewhere that has enormous emotional significance to many religions unless they wanted to stir up trouble? But the Raelians want to welcome the aliens in Jerusalem! Jerusalem is the one spot on the planet Earth most likely to be the catalyst for a world-wide religious war.

Over the years, the Raelian Religion has specifically tried to convert Jews and establish the Elohim embassy in Jerusalem. Since the "Raelians believe that the ancient Israelites had a special covenant with Earth's creator" and since they "believe that the destruction of the world is near," the Raelians also believe that "the state of Israel must grant Raelians land in Jerusalem on which to build an embassy to welcome the aliens" (Gazette, p. A4). However, given that the Swastika has been so offensive to Jews specifically, and that Jews have claim to their own special relationship with the Creator, these stated goals of the Raelian Religion have also drawn fire.

The Raelian Religion has not been unaware or unconcerned about public relations problems. In 1991, "Rael decided to change the symbol of the Raelian Religion and replace the swastika with a galaxy..." . This was done, not only "out of respect for victims of the Nazi holocaust," but also for a very practical reason — to "facilitate the building of the Embassy in Israel…" (Ibid.).

The initial Raelian use of the Swastika is certainly worrisome. Then, responding to complaints, they switched to a new symbol. But did the Raelians even switch to a galaxy as their symbol? Or did they switch to a symbol that has huge religious and cultural significance (you have to wait for the animation to run to the end to see the star symbol; or see the star near the top of this page) that even now plays a key role in a violent clash of civilizations? Decide for yourself whether there is something deeper going on.

The Raelian use of the Swastika and the Star Of David prepares the public for apocalyptic visions. Some of you still may not be convinced. Okay, consider just one more fact. These aliens are small, have green skin, and almond eyes.

Rael is actually Claude Vorilhon, a former French automobile journalist, who explains in his book, The True Face of God, that he was taken to the planet Elohim in a flying saucer in 1975 and introduced to such noted earthlings as Jesus, Buddha, Joseph Smith and Confucius. The Elohim, small human-shaped beings with pale green skin and almond eyes, were apparently the original inspiration for the Judeo-Christian god. They informed Vorilhon that he was the final prophet -- sent to relay a message of peace and sensual meditation to humankind under his new name of Rael -- before the Elohim would return to Jerusalem in the year 2025.

This presents a problem for the aliens. The aliens need a way to grow up among us and build sufficient numbers to play a ground support role for the coming spaceship attack at the embassy site. How to get a lot of them growing up here without their being recognized as aliens? Easy. Reproductive cloning by transfer of a nucleus into an unfertilized egg is a risky primitive technique which works only in a small percentage of cases in other species. Its suspected of causing side-effects in the resulting clone animals. Well how convenient. Once these alien clone babies start growing up all green and little the Raelians will have a plausible explanation: That's just a horrible side effect of the primitive cloning technique that was used to make them. They are just humans with birth defects. Who will know better? There have been no previous human clones to judge them against. They will tell us that we should feel sorry for all those Raelian babies that were born with horrible birth defects. Its a perfect cover story.

In the face of a threat from an advanced space-faring alien species bent on our subjugation how can we save ourselves? The clues are all embedded in old episodes of all of the Star Trek series. We need to cut a deal with the Ferengi to get some advanced black market Romulan military technology. I'm sure the Ferengi will be willing to deal as long as they can be assured of making a very large profit from the transaction. One sweetener we could offer them would be prominent roles in future Star Trek TV episodes and movies. I say its a small price to pay. Though Armin Shimerman (assuming he's not really a Ferengi in disguise - which seems likely if you stop to think about it) will surely resent the competition.

Update: What is especially galling about this alien plot is that the aliens are intent on tricking human parents to finance the creation of the alien army in our midst.

Rael had been more candid in his interview, saying the price of a clone, "when we get started", would be $200,000 a time. "We have knowledge; we have the science; we have the customers; we need the money. We're just trying to put together customers and organisers. It depends on the investors, the money we have."

If Rael is in contact with aliens then surely they can supply him with much more advanced technology for doing cloning. That technology, like all truly advanced technology, would be cheap to operate. Therefore most of the $200,000 cost per clone must be pure profit that flows to a shadowy alien organization. But then doesn't this mean that the Rael's aliens are every bit as much capitalistic money-grubbers as the Ferengi? Could we even be the targets of the plots of competing Ferengi commercial groups?

Part of the cleverly crafted Raelian cover story is to act in a way that makes them be perceived as a bunch of loony but harmless nutcases.

Doctors and other scientists immediately condemned the claim, saying it was unfounded and unethical. The British fertility specialist Robert Winston said those behind the announcement had no scientific credibility.

"These people are barking mad. If you believe in extraterrestrials, it says it all. One will only believe they have cloned a baby if they provide the proof," Lord Winston said.

Update II: In an interview with CNN Rael claims that by cloning we can create new bodies to move our minds into so that we can have eternal youth.

From 30 years ago, I have been saying human cloning is coming. It will give us eternal life. Then the next step will be to discover accelerated growth process, which is coming soon, then we will be able to live eternally from a body to another body, and download or upload our memory and personality in the cloned body when we die, so we are alive forever.

Do not be fooled. Memory transfer to a new body would be a perfect time to insert an alien soul into an outwardly human body. This would make a perfect way for aliens to secretly take over human bodies as part of their plot to take over the planet Earth. How would we know that a switch didn't get made when a person's memories were being switched to a new body? The aliens may know how to extract relevant memories from a person's life so that the new body's brain would be able to recall that life and pretend to be that person even as a different alien personality was put in charge.

Update III: Stanley Kurtz uncovers the Raeilian plot for gay group marriage.

Let us stipulate that the Raelians are a bunch of nuts. (As a stick-in-the-mud conservative, I'm willing to tolerate them. "Actively loving their differences" will have to wait.) But there's an obvious method to the Raelians' madness. Take away the bits about aliens engineering our DNA, and the Raelians are committed to an only slightly shallower than usual version of Left-liberal utopianism. As such, the Raelians remind us that, just like cloning, demands for legalized polyamory are only a few steps down the road. And just like the (slightly saner) organized polyamory movement itself, the Raelians obviously link the quest for state-recognized polyamory with the demand for gay marriage. That link is not only present in the Raelians' support for homosexual and bisexual polyamory, but in the report that the second cloned baby will be born to a lesbian couple.

Does this mean that the aliens are homosexuals? Or that the aliens are trying to make us all be homosexuals so that we don't reproduce in order that we die off and make room for them to take over the planet? Or are the aliens trying to destroy the institution of marriage so that our societies descend into chaos and become easier to defeat in the coming alien invasion?

There's another observation about the Raelians that is so obvious and yet I haven't heard anyone mention it: Raelian rhymes with Alien. Maybe some of the Raelians are really aliens and are having a joke at our expense that we haven't noticed it. Maybe Rael himself is an insane Vulcan who escaped from a Vulcan mental hospital and, after a bit of plastic surgery, blended in to our society. That would explain why the Ferengis chose an actor who looks like him to play a fictional version of his character in Star Trek V - The Final Frontier. Has Rael ever submitted to a DNA test to prove that he's really a human? Isn't it time that governments demand a blood sample from him to use to verify his humanity?

Also, the Raelian position in support of DNA engineering suggests another way that they may be working for an alien agenda: the Raelians could be introducing bits of alien DNA sequence into their "clone" babies in order to make an alien-human hybrid race that would gradually take over the world. No wonder the parents of the first clone baby are reluctant to allow their kid's DNA to be tested. Didn't Fox Mulder try to warn us of this danger in the X-Files?